Adele has to cancel her live dates for the rest of 2011

Singer Adele has to cancel all of her live dates in 2011, due to problems with her voice. As a result of this she will have to have an operation to try and fix this problem.The operation involves having her vocal cords swapped with Kermit the Frog. This will make her more and more like Miss Piggy.

When asked about the operation the singer said " I've always loved the puppets , this takes it to the next level and will give me more of a unique voice that I've always wanted"

Hopefully the singer will be back to full health soon and record her new album. Which is going to be called   "the Muppet show : miss piggy".

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News Corp try to buy the Sky

News Corp are trying to monopolies the world by buying the Sky. If the deal that's worth more than 40 billion, if the deal goes ahead people will be taxed for consuming some of the Sky's hit shows like night, blue sky and red sky at night Sheppard's delight.

 When question over the unfair tax Rupert Murdoch replied "theres nothing wrong with what we're doing, if you don't want to pay the tax its simple, don't look at the sky!! Blind people seem to have the right idea"

This is bad for competitors Virgin as News corp will be achieving a monopoly over the new market and there's very little that can be done to stop it. It is also bad for all airlines as part of the tax will include planes. Murdoch said "planes are going to be trespassing on our property so its only right to tax them"

Ryan air boss Michael O'Leary , had an creative way to avoid the tax "I'm going to make are planes fly lower, in fact they wont even fly as that will cost extra if the customers want that"


Hopefully the deal goes go ahead otherwise the only thing you'll get when you look at the sky, will be a big bill.


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Man Utd blame their 6-1 Loss against Rivals City on their Celebration

When asked about the equal biggest loss Man Utd in the premier league Rio Ferdinand replied "The city crowd confused me! They all seemed to be facing the wrong way, so I thought I was playing up front"

 Ferdinand then added "I thinking about it now it seems a bit stupid but I'm not payed to think"

This begs the question was untied star defender in the mind set for the game? Clearly not as his amazing defending managed to ONLY concede 6. Against their neighbours Manchester City who are starting to look far superior than Manchester United.

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Gadaffi Spotted with George Bush at World Series Game

Gadaffi was seen alive on October 20th, with former US President George. W. Bush, as together they watched the Rangers narrowly winning over the Cardinals.

The two seemed in high spirits, going against millions of recent reports that Gadaffi is supposedly dead, which begs the question, who have they actually captured and KILLED in Libya. As Gadaffi seemed to be very much alive, as he was chanting on his favorite team, the Rangers.

Bush was also enjoying the festivities and seemed very happy to be spending some quality time with his long time friend, Kernel Gadaffi. As the game drew to an end, the two were seen enjoying a cigar, and then said their goodbyes with a hug, before parting their seperate ways.

The event seemed wrong on so many levels, the man who is meant to be dead, Muammar Gadaffi, has possibly been on US soil for quite some time, even after the vast searches for him, with support from the USA.

When questined about the event, George Bush denied the allegation, and replied only with 'that never happened, I been busier than a one legged man in a butt kicken contest'. We can only assume he denies all allegations.

Howver, if our sources have informed us correctly, this could pose a major security threat to the United States, and could also mean a major uproar in Libya, the country he once ruled, now knowing they have killed the wrong guy.



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